You may have read about my sister who had a child at age 14. I wrote about her in my book *THE SEXUALLY SMART GIRL.* She lives in the village. Before I traveled for my Granny’s burial, news always came to me that she was a bad kid; stone-hearted, disrespectful, and a liar – she would leave the house for days and not come back, she would not even care about her kid.
Our mother had gotten to a point that she no longer care about her. It seems everyone, even my other siblings had given up on her. Her attitude was strange to them and they did not know how to handle her. She was saucy and would stand against anyone that dared to challenge her, even her father. To everyone, she was a bad kid to be distanced, but I had another opinion about her.
She was an additional motivation for me to travel back home as early as I did but I did not see her until the fourth day. Everything they said about her was true. On my second day in the village, I sat at the front of where she was living with my mother and called her on the phone to come and meet me there, but she did not come and I did not see her until the fourth day during the way-keep ceremony.
As they said about her, she looked at me and ignored me –she knew me, but she seemed not to care who I was. I realized, however, that she felt a little restrain but she did not have the confidence to walk up to me or even greet, as opposed to the belief that she does not regard anyone, – she was only afraid I would lash out at her or even beat her in public. She believes everyone in the family hates her.
I called her out of annoyance and began to lash out at her but she felt no remorse and became more defensive; I was doing the same thing that others have been doing to her – blaming her and calling her a bad child. Amid my anger, I realized I would be doing more damage to her, so I switched my approach.
The moment I said, “Do not think everyone hates you, I love you.” Her countenance changed, it seems as if her defenses have been taken away from her – she became vulnerable and tears were gushing down her eyes. I could not control my tears either. I love my sister so much. I hugged her and we both cried. I said I wanted her to change, and she promised she would.
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She showed that she would change by doing everything I asked her to do that night, it was her calls that woke me up in the hotel the next morning. She was asking me what she could do to help – that was not to be expected of a stone-hearted kid.
They said she was disrespectful, but every word she said to me from that moment we cried together was followed with “sir,” and she knelt anytime she wanted to speak to me. She was free with me about everything and never lied to me. This is contrary to everything that was said about her. According to people, she was very disrespectful and lies a lot, but with me from the moment we spoke, it was the opposite.
Just a few days ago, when she called my phone severally and I was not available to answer, she sent a text that almost brought me to tears again. “My brother, I promised to change.” She thought I was ignoring her calls because she has not fully changed, but I was only busy. I called to explain to her and she was happy again.
Now, there are questions for you to answer.
1. What changed my sister from a bad girl to a good girl within a few days?
2. What changed her from a disrespectful girl to a very respectful girl?
3. What changed her from a chronic lier to a girl that will never lie to me?
4. What made a perceived stone-hearted girl cry the moment I said: “I love you”?
There is more to people than we can see, and only if we can judge less, and love more, the world will be a better place. In part 4 of this article, I will explain why my beloved sister became very hardened and unrepentant, and why I was able to influence her the way no other person has done before.
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Credit Soule rhymeze