I’m really scared to tell this guy what i once went through🥺🥺

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Plz keep me anonymous
I’m 22 years and in the university I’m a victim of rape.I was raped at a tender age,due to this i hv developed this hatred for any guy that seems to be interested in me.At the mention of sex or dick freak me to death.This whole situation had made me do a lot of nasty stuffs such as having sex with girls, smoking which fortunately i hv put a stop to.I always hv this feeling that no guy will love to date me after finding out that I was once raped. I hv this close friend whom i was crushing on buh afraid to tell abt it. Recently he confesses his love for me and also proposed to me. Imagine being in a relationship with your crush. Buh guys I’m really scared to tell this guy what i once went through and also if he demands for sex what will i do? I just don’t know what to do.please help a sister

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